Hey can I whine a bit

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Aklogcabin

Awesome Friend
Neighbor
Joined
Jun 17, 2021
Messages
414
Hello all. I'm trying to not have any personal pity party here, just life. Doesn't mean I'm not effected by getting old n worn out. I used to think I was invincible n did my best to prove it. I was wrong. Worked n played hard. But man was it fun !
Now I'm retired or something. Just kinda seems I have more time to play with/fix all my toys n grandkids.
Probably mostly bummed cause I'm not sitting in the middle of nowhere on the sofa or front deck moose hunting out of our cabin instead of our home. At least I can still do moose calls from here. I've called in a few. Our grandson was on the front porch last evening doing moose n wolf calls. Good instincts in this one.
But I miss the wild. I miss getting dropped off on a remote lake n watching the bush plane take off of the water. When those skis lift. Your on your own. No more contact with the outside world. Look up n see Mt Denali. Smell the musty smell of the highbush cranberries. There leaves turning red, glowing against the bright yellow of the devilsclubs or or dark spruce. The feel of walking on muskkeg.
Getting to our cabin a couple miles later n sitting on the porch having a slug of whiskey. N a cold beer. No one, no body no thing no time no clock.
Hey, I'm feeling kinda couped up I guess. I have some nerve damage that I need to get healed up before I go out n harvest a 1400 pound bull moose. But I could do it. Well I keep telling myself that anyhows. Probably why I'm sitting here having a little pity party.
But I do have to say. Thanks for letting me vent. I do feel better.
Life is much better when I live on my wins
 
Glad you felt comfortable to vent, many times just "getting it out" is a big help.
Restless is a strange feeling, if I am reading what you wrote correctly, nothing is really "wrong", something just doesn't feel right.
 
Hello all. I'm trying to not have any personal pity party here, just life. Doesn't mean I'm not effected by getting old n worn out. I used to think I was invincible n did my best to prove it. I was wrong. Worked n played hard. But man was it fun !
Now I'm retired or something. Just kinda seems I have more time to play with/fix all my toys n grandkids.
Probably mostly bummed cause I'm not sitting in the middle of nowhere on the sofa or front deck moose hunting out of our cabin instead of our home. At least I can still do moose calls from here. I've called in a few. Our grandson was on the front porch last evening doing moose n wolf calls. Good instincts in this one.
But I miss the wild. I miss getting dropped off on a remote lake n watching the bush plane take off of the water. When those skis lift. Your on your own. No more contact with the outside world. Look up n see Mt Denali. Smell the musty smell of the highbush cranberries. There leaves turning red, glowing against the bright yellow of the devilsclubs or or dark spruce. The feel of walking on muskkeg.
Getting to our cabin a couple miles later n sitting on the porch having a slug of whiskey. N a cold beer. No one, no body no thing no time no clock.
Hey, I'm feeling kinda couped up I guess. I have some nerve damage that I need to get healed up before I go out n harvest a 1400 pound bull moose. But I could do it. Well I keep telling myself that anyhows. Probably why I'm sitting here having a little pity party.
But I do have to say. Thanks for letting me vent. I do feel better.
Life is much better when I live on my wins
Why certainly it's okay if you whine a few minutes.
Everybody needs to vent sometimes.
Glad you got it of your chest.
Everyone gets the blues, restless.
Hope you feel better soon.
Hang in there, it will get better or so they say.
 
I admire you Ak. Most younger folks wouldn't or couldn't do what you used to enjoy doing. Time takes its toll on all of us to one degree or another.
 
No great words of wisdom to provide but I can certainly understand what your speaking about. I was there recently, vented a bit here, and was greeted with the same hospitality. Some times you just need to get it off your chest / mind.

I admire you Ak. Most younger folks wouldn't or couldn't do what you used to enjoy doing. Time takes its toll on all of us to one degree or another.

@bkt

So very true.
 
Better out than in! Through the years I've know a couple of people who allowed regret and it's frustrations rule the rest of their life. There was an event, a moment in time, they could never get past, or let themselves get past. The rest of their years were wasted, tragic. I almost fell into the trap... in my late 30's I came down with a debilitating illness. I lost everything I'd worked decades for, my future and every plan was gone. I had several bad years but one day it finally dawned on me... either sit here and wait to die or get up and live every moment to the fullest of my remaining abilities... did the regrets and sense of loss go away? No, but I refuse to let them rule my life. A big part of that is getting rid of those feelings. Over the years I worked up dozens of ways to deal... Better out than in is a good rule to follow!
 
Probably a lot of us here have good reason to whine now and then, especially when we're getting older and have a hard time doing even a small amount of what we used to do. It seems not all that long ago that I used to take walks up the mountain behind us, 2 and 3 times a week on paths of up to 8 miles, when we built the 1,100 gallon cistern at the top of our property, I was able to sling a 94 pound sack of cement on my shoulder and climb up to where I built the cistern, next month I'll be 79 and even now I realize those days are gone, now days a 90 pound sack of Ready Mix feels like I'm lifting a battleship anchor and taking a short walk to check out our spring gets me huffing and puffing. Truth is, at my age I feel pretty dang good, God has really blessed me with very few aches or pains and my brain still works without any bad hiccups.
 
@Aklogcabin ,
OMG can I relate to everything you said.
Been there , lived in the wilderness..hunted bear, moose wolf ..fished the walleye and pike.
Raised horses , broke horses , showed horses , carved out a great homestead ...

Now I'm as close to being useless as one can be. Moving close to town, small yard , smaller house.. time to hang up the guns, the spurs and the garden tools.
I guess I've crashed your whineathon.

Look my friend ...we still waking up everyday , still got family.

Love sitting on front porch ....it could be worse.

See your not alone.😊

Jim
 
Oh how I can understand. . . my hunny has had back and neck issues for years now. He still think he can do MANY things which he regrets the next day. You just need to keep doing what you can and teach your grand kids, passing on what your life experiences have been is a great accomplishment! :) I have been gardening and raising what I could harvesting with my grands. Now their little family has their own garden and a few chickens now. You may not be able to do as much as you used to, BUT there is a new generation in your life that can. I have been canning and doing other things, like making laundry detergent with the just so they have the knowledge.
 
I sure get where your coming from. Trashed my back when I was 29. Dealt with it ever since. Some days are good, others are hard to put my shoes on.
Whine and bitch all you need or want too. Most on hear will listen and several will share their issues. We all end up wore out to some extent and can relate.
Dani has a great point though. Share all you can with the younger folks. Best way for them to learn. And no better teacher than one with experience
 
@Aklogcabin ,
OMG can I relate to everything you said.
Been there , lived in the wilderness..hunted bear, moose wolf ..fished the walleye and pike.
Raised horses , broke horses , showed horses , carved out a great homestead ...

Now I'm as close to being useless as one can be. Moving close to town, small yard , smaller house.. time to hang up the guns, the spurs and the garden tools.
I guess I've crashed your whineathon.

Look my friend ...we still waking up everyday , still got family.

Love sitting on front porch ....it could be worse.

See your not alone.😊

Jim

Jim, nowhere near useless. Sure, transitions happen and are a part of everyday life. No, we are not alone. Downsizing never means being useless. By the way; never hang up the guns. Ever. ;)

To add I am going to add a video I feel is appropriate in the correct forum that I listen to when I am struggling. Many here know I choose music as my pathway so it is my thought on the matter at this point.

Sorry, cannot find the music video forum so mods if / when you do please place this



there.

Thanks.

Addiction, struggling with life, etc, etc... To me it matters.
 
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Hey thanks all it's appreciated. Guess part of my issue is that I believe that I can still go back n do all the things I used to do.
Just gotta get healed up.
I am also the kind of guy that has to do everything myself. Probably because we didn't have the money to have someone else do . We're set up to be able to handle most chores from fixing vehicles, welding carpentry electrical crafts. Just what we did. And since I usually bought 2 of everything when something broke we have a good amount of supplies n materials.
Now I'm just thinking that all the valuable stuff I've collected will just be stuff our kids or someone will have to just throw out. Garage sales sell it at 95 % discount. Ohhh well I guess. Back to groaning again. And exactly why I tend to live on my wins man. I can make this. And I am. Just takes more time. I used to just work through the pain, get up n go. Don't stop though. Had to. I had a family to support. I knew I was writing checks that were going to come back buying time.
Hey I'm good , actually great. That's how I fly.
I can sit back n look around. At the house we built. I know every board, wire, pipe. Our land, I know every hole, I dug them.
We have every toy imaginable, snogos, wheelers, boats, cool rides n enough scrap to build a few more.
We hope to build our retirement home next year. It will be interesting to see what come with us. I like having enough snogos or wheelers around so we can do things together as a family. Not the kind of folks who desire sell all. I would rather just pass it on to our kids grandkids. Hope they want it. Oh well.
We'll see how much we can get done today like every day of my life. And take a moment to sit back n think about what I have done. I'm surrounded by my family n were all healthy. Worn out bodies but internally OK. I do my best to do my part n take care of my body. And doing pretty good there keeping my weight in check. Eating healthy foods. Been able to pretty much do the jobs I've had n enjoy doing my job. Heck going out n checking on the rabbits n putting them up for food is about the only thing I need to do daily but we're set up correctly so it's pretty enjoyable. Do gotta build another snow plow truck n put a trany seal in the other one. Front wheel bearing in our El Camino. Dump run n such.
Wow . Living on my wins man. Makes me feel all better again.
And feeding blessed that I can. Thanks Lord
 
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Hello all. I'm trying to not have any personal pity party here, just life. Doesn't mean I'm not effected by getting old n worn out. I used to think I was invincible n did my best to prove it. I was wrong. Worked n played hard. But man was it fun !
Now I'm retired or something. Just kinda seems I have more time to play with/fix all my toys n grandkids.
Probably mostly bummed cause I'm not sitting in the middle of nowhere on the sofa or front deck moose hunting out of our cabin instead of our home. At least I can still do moose calls from here. I've called in a few. Our grandson was on the front porch last evening doing moose n wolf calls. Good instincts in this one.
But I miss the wild. I miss getting dropped off on a remote lake n watching the bush plane take off of the water. When those skis lift. Your on your own. No more contact with the outside world. Look up n see Mt Denali. Smell the musty smell of the highbush cranberries. There leaves turning red, glowing against the bright yellow of the devilsclubs or or dark spruce. The feel of walking on muskkeg.
Getting to our cabin a couple miles later n sitting on the porch having a slug of whiskey. N a cold beer. No one, no body no thing no time no clock.
Hey, I'm feeling kinda couped up I guess. I have some nerve damage that I need to get healed up before I go out n harvest a 1400 pound bull moose. But I could do it. Well I keep telling myself that anyhows. Probably why I'm sitting here having a little pity party.
But I do have to say. Thanks for letting me vent. I do feel better.
Life is much better when I live on my wins

The wilderness has a way of touching a man’s soul like nothing else can of this world. Once you have experienced the grandeur of creation and the absolute solitude of true wilderness, there is no other earthly substitute. It will haunt you until you return. Every time I leave my mountain I have a true since of urgency to get my worldly visits and business done until I return.

Hang in there. The good news is that you are just a short travel to your happy spot!

I leave you with a quote from my childhood hero:

It was good to be back in the wilderness again, where everything seems as peace. I was alone - just me and the animals. It was a great feeling - free once more to plan and do as I pleased. Beyond was all around me. My dream was a dream no longer. I suppose I was here because this was something I had to do - not just dream about it but do it. I suppose too I was here to test myself - not that I had never done it before but this time it was to be a more thorough and lasting examination. What was I capable of that I didn't know yet? Could I truly enjoy my own company for an entire year? And was I equal to everything this wild land could throw at me? I had seen its moods in late spring, summer, and early fall but what about the winter? Would I love the isolation then, with its bone-stabbing cold, its ghostly silence? At age 51, I intended to find out.“ — Richard Proenneke

Source: Richard Proenneke quotes | Quotes of famous people
 
Alaskajohn, thanks that must be it. I could drop everything n go live at the cabin forever. I would be sitting out there now if I could. I do hope to get a couple weeks in for the end of moose season. We need the meat, although the freezer is full. So I guess I just kinda figured out that the dad in me that wants to provide for my family is still a big driver. And I can combine that with being in the outdoors.
But yeah your right. I do have that urge in me. Enough drive to want to build a remote cabin so I could be out.
Thanks man
 
Alaskajohn, thanks that must be it. I could drop everything n go live at the cabin forever. I would be sitting out there now if I could. I do hope to get a couple weeks in for the end of moose season. We need the meat, although the freezer is full. So I guess I just kinda figured out that the dad in me that wants to provide for my family is still a big driver. And I can combine that with being in the outdoors.
But yeah your right. I do have that urge in me. Enough drive to want to build a remote cabin so I could be out.
Thanks man

Oh, to be able to live like this ought to be every man’s passion. I hope Proenneke is now walking in an even more spectacular settings.

1630599644275.jpeg

1630599678954.png
 
I found out today that a family member/friend who had been fairly supportive by reaching out to me, checking on me, being reasonable and not discussing politics, etc. has now proclaimed there will be no visiting me since my state is so backward and archaic (see the new abortion law). They will not be spending any vacation dollars here. So mature. So thoughtful. I support that decision 100%.
:LOL:
I thought of their state, which is also not too far off from where this state stands on abortions either. Who bases family visits on politics?
:huh:
So, pass the bean dip.
 
When I had my some vertebrae fused in my neck because my spinal cord was getting cut in half. On the morning of my surgery the surgeon comes to see me before the surgery. First words were. Glad to see you made it back, last time I saw you I wasn't so sure that was going to happen. So if you could measure how close you have come. How about the thickness of your thumbnail close. Not whining here about that, Thank You Good Lord.
Just another example of how far I try to push my body. And as I wrote earlier work hard play hard. Kinda wore things out, but man was it fun
 
The wilderness has a way of touching a man’s soul like nothing else can of this world. Once you have experienced the grandeur of creation and the absolute solitude of true wilderness, there is no other earthly substitute. It will haunt you until you return. Every time I leave my mountain I have a true since of urgency to get my worldly visits and business done until I return.

Hang in there. The good news is that you are just a short travel to your happy spot!

I leave you with a quote from my childhood hero:

It was good to be back in the wilderness again, where everything seems as peace. I was alone - just me and the animals. It was a great feeling - free once more to plan and do as I pleased. Beyond was all around me. My dream was a dream no longer. I suppose I was here because this was something I had to do - not just dream about it but do it. I suppose too I was here to test myself - not that I had never done it before but this time it was to be a more thorough and lasting examination. What was I capable of that I didn't know yet? Could I truly enjoy my own company for an entire year? And was I equal to everything this wild land could throw at me? I had seen its moods in late spring, summer, and early fall but what about the winter? Would I love the isolation then, with its bone-stabbing cold, its ghostly silence? At age 51, I intended to find out.“ — Richard Proenneke

Source: Richard Proenneke quotes | Quotes of famous people
I love watching and reading about him. I'd loved to have been able to do what he did. Too old and messed up to try it now but at least I live vicariously through him.
 
Ok , sniveling ya want.
2 knee replacements.
3 tachycardia events ( lightning bolt ⚡ thru chest all 3 times.)
Followed up now with Covid while in process of moving.

I surrender already

Nuff sniveling.

For now.

Jim
Sniveling???
2 knee replacements
right elbow
TBI-seizures
crushed vertebrates in neck
Damaged vertebrates in back
torn rotor cup
loss of hearing
Ahh! Ain't youth grand?
Taking a day at a time, step at a time.
Thinking about joining 5 K team again.
 
We have an old ham radio friend in New Mexico that my husband was really close to that posted on FB that you need to unfriend him if you haven't been vaxxed. So, I get the no friend visiting you cuz you live in TX, Patchouli. Over baby killing. And this over vaxxing.
People are just trying to find reasons to be hateful to each other.
Finally found the strength to be out in the garden today, it's been about 10 days. I suspect it was covid. Again. But hey, I'm getting good at this.
 
@Amish Heart it's my husband's side of the family and I have known that in-law longer than I knew my husband. The way I see it, you either want to come and visit me or you don't. If a person chooses my state's political and moral or legal standings over our relationship, then I guess it wasn't so great of a relationship. That was why I said I support their decision 100%. They can go ahead and stay the heck away from me if they don't like my state's abortion laws.

Okay, so am I ranting or whining? ;)
 
I found out today that a family member/friend who had been fairly supportive by reaching out to me, checking on me, being reasonable and not discussing politics, etc. has now proclaimed there will be no visiting me since my state is so backward and archaic (see the new abortion law). They will not be spending any vacation dollars here. So mature. So thoughtful. I support that decision 100%.
:LOL:
I thought of their state, which is also not too far off from where this state stands on abortions either. Who bases family visits on politics?
:huh:
So, pass the bean dip.
We have an old ham radio friend in New Mexico that my husband was really close to that posted on FB that you need to unfriend him if you haven't been vaxxed. So, I get the no friend visiting you cuz you live in TX, Patchouli. Over baby killing. And this over vaxxing.
People are just trying to find reasons to be hateful to each other.
Finally found the strength to be out in the garden today, it's been about 10 days. I suspect it was covid. Again. But hey, I'm getting good at this.

Ahhhh. So I'm not alone in being disowned.
 
Its not just you ladies. Guy I grew up with, played basketball with for years now thinks I've lost my mind because I won't drink the cool aid. And tell how Jesus wouldn't be a conservative. More folks I grew up around and had no clue till Trump got in office.
If they will throw years of personal knowledge away over crap like that, I say they weren't good friends to start with. And that's on them. I'm not about to lose sleep over people being woke. Well at least not unless they come after me, then it'll be game on
 

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