Humor and Jokes

Discussion in 'Front Porch Chat' started by phideaux, Dec 3, 2017.

Help Support Homesteading Forum by donating using the link above.
  1. Dec 3, 2017 #1

    phideaux

    phideaux

    phideaux

    Spectator of Life Neighbor

    Joined:
    Nov 24, 2017
    Messages:
    3,680
    Likes Received:
    15,242
    Location:
    West Ky
    Now ifin you ain't a homesteader...then don't read this...


    16831102_427623727582219_1616805176572078065_n.jpg

    Jim
     
  2. Dec 3, 2017 #2

    phideaux

    phideaux

    phideaux

    Spectator of Life Neighbor

    Joined:
    Nov 24, 2017
    Messages:
    3,680
    Likes Received:
    15,242
    Location:
    West Ky
    Well I made it, several years ago...

    retire.jpg

    Jim
     
  3. Dec 4, 2017 #3

    Sentry18

    Sentry18

    Sentry18

    Hired Gun Staff Member Moderator Neighbor HCL Supporter

    Joined:
    Nov 26, 2017
    Messages:
    5,072
    Likes Received:
    28,135
    weekend-morning-awesomeness-20.jpg
     
  4. Dec 4, 2017 #4

    Redbeard

    Redbeard

    Redbeard

    Awesome Friend Neighbor HCL Supporter

    Joined:
    Dec 4, 2017
    Messages:
    455
    Likes Received:
    2,240
    Location:
    NH
  5. Dec 4, 2017 #5

    phideaux

    phideaux

    phideaux

    Spectator of Life Neighbor

    Joined:
    Nov 24, 2017
    Messages:
    3,680
    Likes Received:
    15,242
    Location:
    West Ky
  6. Dec 4, 2017 #6

    Amish Heart

    Amish Heart

    Amish Heart

    Awesome Friend Neighbor HCL Supporter

    Joined:
    Dec 3, 2017
    Messages:
    4,125
    Likes Received:
    23,705
    Redbeard...one of our daughters would be following that alpaca!! She loves em.
     
  7. Dec 4, 2017 #7

    Sentry18

    Sentry18

    Sentry18

    Hired Gun Staff Member Moderator Neighbor HCL Supporter

    Joined:
    Nov 26, 2017
    Messages:
    5,072
    Likes Received:
    28,135
    I found a rare clip of @havasu doing some vehicle based firearms training.

    daily-morning-awesomeness-35-photos-254.gif
     
  8. Dec 4, 2017 #8

    phideaux

    phideaux

    phideaux

    Spectator of Life Neighbor

    Joined:
    Nov 24, 2017
    Messages:
    3,680
    Likes Received:
    15,242
    Location:
    West Ky
    When I get up everyday........

    outta bed.jpg

    Jim
     
  9. Dec 4, 2017 #9

    Redbeard

    Redbeard

    Redbeard

    Awesome Friend Neighbor HCL Supporter

    Joined:
    Dec 4, 2017
    Messages:
    455
    Likes Received:
    2,240
    Location:
    NH
    My wife and daughter love them too. My daughter is taking a fiber class and i told her if she did well she could get a fiber animal. She said alpaca, i said a fiber animal we can eat, she said well all you got to do is butcher it then, im still thinking sheep. I have never gotten along with alpacas or lamas. But i have heard they are tasty!
     
    MoBookworm1957, Fort, Flight and 5 others like this.
  10. Dec 4, 2017 #10

    phideaux

    phideaux

    phideaux

    Spectator of Life Neighbor

    Joined:
    Nov 24, 2017
    Messages:
    3,680
    Likes Received:
    15,242
    Location:
    West Ky
    Had to steal this one from next door , at our sister gun forum...

    No nativity scene in Washington DC this year.
    The Supreme Court has ruled that there cannot be a Live Nativity Scene on Capitol Hill this Christmas season.

    This isn't for any religious reason.

    They simply have not been able to find Three Wise Men in the Nation's Capital.
    A search for a Virgin also continues.

    There was no problem, however, finding enough asses to fill the stable.


    Jim
    :LOL:
    :LOL:
    Stop....it...:cry:
     
  11. Dec 4, 2017 #11

    Sentry18

    Sentry18

    Sentry18

    Hired Gun Staff Member Moderator Neighbor HCL Supporter

    Joined:
    Nov 26, 2017
    Messages:
    5,072
    Likes Received:
    28,135
    4d492976ea3daebc0b47df9b30fc2721.jpg
     
    MoBookworm1957, viking, Fort and 19 others like this.
  12. Dec 4, 2017 #12

    phideaux

    phideaux

    phideaux

    Spectator of Life Neighbor

    Joined:
    Nov 24, 2017
    Messages:
    3,680
    Likes Received:
    15,242
    Location:
    West Ky
    Thats how I am...I'm really a polite person...

    Facebook-20140705-122509.jpg


    Jim
     
  13. Dec 4, 2017 #13

    Double R

    Double R

    Double R

    Awesome Friend Neighbor HCL Supporter

    Joined:
    Nov 25, 2017
    Messages:
    2,142
    Likes Received:
    5,638
    I got a call not long ago from my god mom in Southern California. She was on the freeway and noticed what she thought was a big dog in the car ahead of her. She just had to immediately call me in hysterical laughter because it wasn’t a dog! It was an alpaca! In the middle of LA in a CAR on the freeway.
    Should I have been offended she said she immediately thought of me because I’m always doing stuff like that???????
     
  14. Dec 4, 2017 #14

    Double R

    Double R

    Double R

    Awesome Friend Neighbor HCL Supporter

    Joined:
    Nov 25, 2017
    Messages:
    2,142
    Likes Received:
    5,638
    (In response to turn signal mud flap)
    Back in the day I used to tell people that when I was driving truck. It’s amazing how many people seem to be unaware that’s what’s that is from!
     
  15. Dec 4, 2017 #15

    Redbeard

    Redbeard

    Redbeard

    Awesome Friend Neighbor HCL Supporter

    Joined:
    Dec 4, 2017
    Messages:
    455
    Likes Received:
    2,240
    Location:
    NH
    We get alot of funny looks when we transport our goats. Loose in the back of the suburban. City folk don't even know what to do when they see it.
     
  16. Dec 4, 2017 #16

    Double R

    Double R

    Double R

    Awesome Friend Neighbor HCL Supporter

    Joined:
    Nov 25, 2017
    Messages:
    2,142
    Likes Received:
    5,638
    I do that too! Calves, hogs, you name it. Lol! I still get teased about going threw burger kind drive threw years ago ordering a bacon cheeseburger with a piglet in my lap.
     
  17. Dec 4, 2017 #17

    Redbeard

    Redbeard

    Redbeard

    Awesome Friend Neighbor HCL Supporter

    Joined:
    Dec 4, 2017
    Messages:
    455
    Likes Received:
    2,240
    Location:
    NH
    Hahahahaha! That's so messed up, i love it! You tell them you brought your own extra bacon?
     
  18. Dec 4, 2017 #18

    Dani

    Dani

    Dani

    Awesome Friend Neighbor HCL Supporter

    Joined:
    Dec 4, 2017
    Messages:
    659
    Likes Received:
    3,066
    I totally get this one! :) We got a lot of strange looks when we brought our calf home in the back of an Expedition when Ellis came loose from being hog tied and her head popped up at a red light. Hunny jumped the seat and I slid over to continue driving home just laughing cause it was one of those "I told you so" moments. Yep, should have brought the stock trailer, but oh no. . .
     
    MoBookworm1957, Fort, joel and 6 others like this.
  19. Dec 4, 2017 #19

    TMT Tactical

    TMT Tactical

    TMT Tactical

    The Great Lizard ! Neighbor

    Joined:
    Dec 4, 2017
    Messages:
    2,633
    Likes Received:
    12,299
    Alpaca can be very people friendly ---- If they are raised from early age around people. Adult Alpaca are not good around people, they are herd types and do not welcome folks into the herd. My Brother lives in Ecuador and I used to sell Alpaca clothes in our little store. It is the second softest natural fiber in the world and many times warmer than wool and super light. Great fiber! :)
     
    viking, MoBookworm1957, Fort and 9 others like this.
  20. Dec 4, 2017 #20

    Double R

    Double R

    Double R

    Awesome Friend Neighbor HCL Supporter

    Joined:
    Nov 25, 2017
    Messages:
    2,142
    Likes Received:
    5,638
    Always come prepared ;)
     
  21. Dec 5, 2017 #21

    Terri9630

    Terri9630

    Terri9630

    Internet Princess Staff Member Moderator Neighbor HCL Supporter

    Joined:
    Dec 3, 2017
    Messages:
    4,778
    Likes Received:
    22,431
    Location:
    Southern and central NM.
    The bearings on one of my trucks hubs fell out during the fair a few years ago. I had to transport 3 goats, a turkey and 4 rabbits and 5 chickens home in our car. Took 2 trips and the kid had a job trying to keep the goats from eating the back seat!
     
  22. Dec 5, 2017 #22

    Sentry18

    Sentry18

    Sentry18

    Hired Gun Staff Member Moderator Neighbor HCL Supporter

    Joined:
    Nov 26, 2017
    Messages:
    5,072
    Likes Received:
    28,135
    gvnn8slpwzujmyswtyw6bygjj71l-vzoikcy1ukvn94.jpg
     
  23. Dec 5, 2017 #23

    havasu

    havasu

    havasu

    Internet Constable Staff Member Admin Moderator Neighbor HCL Supporter

    Joined:
    Nov 24, 2017
    Messages:
    4,193
    Likes Received:
    10,490
    Location:
    Southern Kommiefornia
    My Rezimay

    Deer Sur,

    I waunt to apply for the secritary job I seen in the
    Paper. I can type real kwik wit one finggar and do
    Sum Acounting 2.


    I think I am good on the fone and I am a pepole
    Person. Pepole really seam to respond goodly to me.

    I'm lookin for a jobb as a secritary but it Kant be 2
    Complikaited

    My spelling is not 2 good but find that I awfin get a
    Job Bcuz of my persinalety..

    My salerery is open so we can discus wat you want
    To pay me and wat you think that I am wurth, I can start imeditely.

    Thank you in advanse 4 yore Anser.

    Hopifuly I M Yore best aplicant so phar.

    Sinseerly,

    Peggy May McBiggins

    PS : I half includeded a pickture of me B low.



    [​IMG]

    Dear Peggy May:

    Start on Monday, we have spell check.

    signed.....
    Harvey Weinstein
     
  24. Dec 5, 2017 #24

    zoomzoom

    zoomzoom

    zoomzoom

    Awesome Friend Neighbor HCL Supporter

    Joined:
    Dec 3, 2017
    Messages:
    1,260
    Likes Received:
    9,082
    I love the story havasu but your pic didn't come through. I get the gist as I've seen it before but dang, it's so much better with the picture.
     
  25. Dec 5, 2017 #25

    Sentry18

    Sentry18

    Sentry18

    Hired Gun Staff Member Moderator Neighbor HCL Supporter

    Joined:
    Nov 26, 2017
    Messages:
    5,072
    Likes Received:
    28,135
    a2d0cc94c3e0a63012fdb2dc9d05c377.jpg
     
  26. Dec 5, 2017 #26

    Sentry18

    Sentry18

    Sentry18

    Hired Gun Staff Member Moderator Neighbor HCL Supporter

    Joined:
    Nov 26, 2017
    Messages:
    5,072
    Likes Received:
    28,135
    What a difference on year makes.

    weekend-morning-awesomeness-40-photos-17.jpg
     
  27. Dec 5, 2017 #27

    Caribou

    Caribou

    Caribou

    Time traveler Neighbor HCL Supporter

    Joined:
    Dec 3, 2017
    Messages:
    2,985
    Likes Received:
    14,932
    At breakfast, the man asked his wife, "What would you do if I won the lottery?"


    She replied, "I'd take half and leave you."









    "Great," he said. "Here's $6. I won $12 yesterday. Stay in touch."
     
  28. Dec 5, 2017 #28

    Amish Heart

    Amish Heart

    Amish Heart

    Awesome Friend Neighbor HCL Supporter

    Joined:
    Dec 3, 2017
    Messages:
    4,125
    Likes Received:
    23,705
    True story: I received a resume online for a preschool teaching position I had open. The young lady wrote that she was the Valley Victorian of her class.
     
  29. Dec 6, 2017 #29

    CrackbottomLouis

    CrackbottomLouis

    CrackbottomLouis

    Awesome Friend Neighbor HCL Supporter

    Joined:
    Dec 4, 2017
    Messages:
    1,007
    Likes Received:
    4,664
    Location:
    GA
    FB_IMG_1512340748830.jpg
     
  30. Dec 6, 2017 #30

    CrackbottomLouis

    CrackbottomLouis

    CrackbottomLouis

    Awesome Friend Neighbor HCL Supporter

    Joined:
    Dec 4, 2017
    Messages:
    1,007
    Likes Received:
    4,664
    Location:
    GA
    5A91F3B3-3E62-4CCC-A050-6F7AAD7B6F28.jpg
     

Share This Page