I need to contact Mike Bloomberg

[SouthCentralUS]

My beans aren't coming up. I need his tutelage.

 

[Supervisor42]

My beans aren't coming up. I need his tutelage.

I'm sure he has a 'wealth' of knowledge just waiting for you
He has been hard to find lately.
I think he planted about a half a billion recently and nothing came up so he probably knows the problem

 

[SouthCentralUS]

Well he said in that speech he could teach everyone in the room to be a farmer.

 

[Supervisor42]

Well he said in that speech he could teach everyone in the room to be a farmer.

To be a farmer, yes. To be able to actually produce something, no.
He never got to finish his talk:
"See, you just put the seed in the ground and then you cover it up"....

"Then when your crop-insurance check comes in, you take it to the bank ".
It's easy!

 

[Supervisor42]

You just need a different mindset to succeed.
Once you get good at not growing anything, the government will actually pay you yearly for not growing anything:
The CRP: Paying Farmers Not to Farm

"Farmers offer to enroll their land in the CRP. It has to be land where crops previously grew. If the USDA accepts the offer, the farmer gets paid a fee, roughly equivalent to the rental value of the land, to stop growing crops on it."

Unfortunately, this is not a joke.

 

[Meerkat]

You just need a different mindset to succeed.
Once you get good at not growing anything, the government will actually pay you yearly for not growing anything:
The CRP: Paying Farmers Not to Farm

Unfortunately, this is not a joke.

well they been paying themselves for many years for doing nothing so they should be good at it by now.

 

[Cnsper]

You could always work some of his rags into the soil..... wait a minute, even those have too much BS for plants.

 

[Amish Heart]

He said he could teach you to farm in five minutes. You should call him.