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Jokes and Humor
- Thread starter phideaux
- Start date
Help Support Homesteading & Country Living Forum:
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This is why you rope cattle, and never try to brand them while in a barn.
Gonna lose some milk production if that is a cow...
If not you waited too long to castrate.
If not you waited too long to castrate.
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OK, a special kind of stupid.
Alright, this just cracked me up......
Couldn't decide whether to put this here or the music thread but it cracked me up so.......
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MALE LOGIC...FLAWLESS (Love it!!!)
WOMAN: DO YOU DRINK BEER?
MAN: YES
WOMAN: HOW MANY BEERS A DAY?
MAN: USUALLY ABOUT THREE
WOMAN: HOW MUCH DO YOU PAY PER BEER?
MAN: $5.00 WHICH INCLUDES A TIP (THIS IS WHERE IT GETS SCARY!)
WOMAN: AND HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN DRINKING?
MAN: ABOUT 20 YEARS, I SUPPOSE
WOMAN: SO A BEER COSTS $5 AND YOU HAVE THREE BEERS A DAY WHICH PUTS YOUR SPENDING EACH MONTH AT $450. IN ONE YEAR, IT WOULD BE APPROXIMATELY $5400 CORRECT?
MAN: CORRECT
WOMAN: IF IN 1 YEAR YOU SPEND $5400, NOT ACCOUNTING FOR INFLATION, THE PAST 20 YEARS PUTS YOUR SPENDING AT $108,000 CORRECT?
MAN: CORRECT
WOMAN: DO YOU KNOW THAT IF YOU DIDN'T DRINK SO MUCH BEER, THAT MONEY COULD HAVE BEEN PUT IN A STEP-UP INTEREST SAVINGS ACCOUNT AND AFTER ACCOUNTING FOR COMPOUND INTEREST FOR THE PAST 20 YEARS, YOU COULD HAVE NOW BOUGHT AN AIRPLANE?
MAN: DO YOU DRINK BEER?
WOMAN: NO..
MAN: WHERE IS YOUR AIRPLANE?
WOMAN: DO YOU DRINK BEER?
MAN: YES
WOMAN: HOW MANY BEERS A DAY?
MAN: USUALLY ABOUT THREE
WOMAN: HOW MUCH DO YOU PAY PER BEER?
MAN: $5.00 WHICH INCLUDES A TIP (THIS IS WHERE IT GETS SCARY!)
WOMAN: AND HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN DRINKING?
MAN: ABOUT 20 YEARS, I SUPPOSE
WOMAN: SO A BEER COSTS $5 AND YOU HAVE THREE BEERS A DAY WHICH PUTS YOUR SPENDING EACH MONTH AT $450. IN ONE YEAR, IT WOULD BE APPROXIMATELY $5400 CORRECT?
MAN: CORRECT
WOMAN: IF IN 1 YEAR YOU SPEND $5400, NOT ACCOUNTING FOR INFLATION, THE PAST 20 YEARS PUTS YOUR SPENDING AT $108,000 CORRECT?
MAN: CORRECT
WOMAN: DO YOU KNOW THAT IF YOU DIDN'T DRINK SO MUCH BEER, THAT MONEY COULD HAVE BEEN PUT IN A STEP-UP INTEREST SAVINGS ACCOUNT AND AFTER ACCOUNTING FOR COMPOUND INTEREST FOR THE PAST 20 YEARS, YOU COULD HAVE NOW BOUGHT AN AIRPLANE?
MAN: DO YOU DRINK BEER?
WOMAN: NO..
MAN: WHERE IS YOUR AIRPLANE?
The Chinese are on to something here!
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Now that is one great marketing idea. Somebody is going to make a fortune, if the hourly rate is not too high.
I walked into a mall in Connecticut and the first thing I saw was a bar.
I thought why doesn't every mall have a bar.
Then I saw a food court and I thought the same thing.
I guess food courts are common but not bars for some reason.
Haven't been in a mall in years.
I thought why doesn't every mall have a bar.
Then I saw a food court and I thought the same thing.
I guess food courts are common but not bars for some reason.
Haven't been in a mall in years.
The last time I was in a "mall" was approx. 2010. With any luck that was my last mall experience. We even have a mall with a gun shop in it, only gun shop in town I won't go to.
............
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Oh, No, Weedy. Not that picture again!!
