I stock cottonelle. 1 roll lasts me about three weeks.
“But, to conclude, I say and maintain, that of all torcheculs, arsewisps, bumfodders, tail-napkins, bunghole cleansers, and wipe-breeches, there is none in the world comparable to the neck of a goose, that is well downed, if you hold her head betwixt your legs. And believe me therein upon mine honour, for you will thereby feel in your nockhole a most wonderful pleasure, both in regard of the softness of the said down and of the temporate heat of the goose, which is easily communicated to the bum-gut and the rest the inwards, in so far as to come even to the regions of the heart and brains.”
In the early 16th century, French monk Francois Rabelais released his famous comic work Gargantua and Pantagruel.
In that book he provided his own personal advice on what to use to clean yourself after doing number 2s:
https://knowledgenuts.com/why-you-should-wipe-yourself-with-a-gooses-neck/
Here in the South iffuns you run outa "therapeutic papers" you can use pine sapplins . ..
I think I actually have that book... Somebody got it for me as a gag gift.
..But pretty sure its around here somewhere
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