Jokes and Humor

[Sparky_D]

 

[Sparky_D]

 

[Sparky_D]

 

[Sparky_D]

 

[Sparky_D]

 

[Sparky_D]

 

[Sparky_D]

 

[Sparky_D]

 

[Sparky_D]

 

[Sparky_D]

 

[Sparky_D]

 

[Sparky_D]

 

[Sparky_D]

 

[joel]

DEAD MAN WALKING!

 

[dademoss]

 

[Peanut]

 

[Peanut]

 

[Peanut]

 

[Patchouli]

 

[Peanut]

One evening in tiny town I'd just moved to I met an old guy from across the street. I said hello and introduced myself.

He said "Terrible, just Terrible." He was sort of mumbling, hard to understand. He said it again when I looked puzzled. Another neighbor walking by said "don't let him pull that... his name is Terry Ball". The old guy smiled, probably his favorite joke.

 

[VThillman]

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The saying is supposed to go "Act like a responsible adult". Um, what?

 

[jazzy]

 

[jazzy]

 

[jazzy]

 

[jazzy]

 

[jazzy]

 

[Supervisor42]

View attachment 72829

I plead guilty for using my Glock as a cordless drill.
We were putting up old metal signs as targets on the 400-yard range.
We had plenty of bolts and wrenches but my brother had left his cordless drill at the camp house over a mile away.
I told him: "I got your holes right here buddy!".
In 5 seconds, 2 perfectly drilled holes for 3/8" bolts were there.

 

[bkt]

View attachment 72826

So...you don't actually buy the beer, you just rent it?

 

[Neb]

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When I first got our of the navy I fixed cash machines and alarm systems for banks. A common cause of false alarms was the cords in the back of cashier cash drawers connected to bill traps (a stack of bills kept an alarm from being triggered until the bills were removed to give to a robber).

I Often had to walk up and down the teller line and tell each teller...

"Excuse me but I need to check your drawers."

Ben

 

[jazzy]